⚽️ 🏀 🏈 🎾 Sports

Races would be a fuck ton more interesting the goal was to finish 4th instead of 1st

💅 Makeup is allowed in beauty pageants yet steroids aren't allowed in sports

Typing your password is like serving in tennis. The first attempt you try to smash it with fuck-off-record-breaker speed. If that doesn't work you go again more carefully, but it's still fast to the casual observer.

Watching a sports team and saying we won is the same as watching a pornstar and saying we had sex

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Figure skating penalty shoot

You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

Soccer (Home Field Advantage):
Advantage tends to be for fields built for soccer: (home team's leading will get less stoppage time; home team losing will have more stoppage time) Built-for fields have fans closer to field (vs. track field). Fans are intimidating to referee. (freakonomicS)

Soccer (penalty Shootouts):
More likely to score when shooting straight ahead, but if miss then singled out as foolish. More dangerous for the individual: better to shoot left/right - and to appear like you "tried".
Goalie: better to dive left/right - to appear like you're trying than to stand in place and miss a left/right - because most players will not take this individual chance - need to jump left/right.
Optics: better to appear like you tried than to actually try to score. (freakonomics)